I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
