Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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