I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
