Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
