Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
