Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
