he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
