he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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