He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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