Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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