just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
