Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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