i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Randomize
