What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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