Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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