So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
