did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
