Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
