the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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