Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize