I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
