Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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