She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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