I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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