did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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