Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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