Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
