I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
