i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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