plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
