I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
