So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We left the knife in your bed.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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