I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
