If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
