his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
did i just pee glitter
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize