it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
