Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
