i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
