I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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