Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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