He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
