It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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