I never want to see another naked old woman again.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
