if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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