Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize