Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
