some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
