I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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