I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Randomize
