Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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